This man was pursuing me when I already had a boyfriend. I was honest with him and told him there was no way I could date him. He bought a phone for me and later told me he didn’t mind if I dated him on the side. I told him that if I were dating him, I wouldn’t date anyone else on the side, so he shouldn’t make things difficult.
He gave me gifts and would send me money. At some point, I grew to like him, but there was no way I was going to betray my boyfriend. He stayed in my life and said he was okay with just being friends. He even told me he had come to respect me because of my honesty.
Then I got married, and he stopped coming around. Once in a while, I would reach out to him, and he would respond. Sometimes he would also reach out to me.
Then I had a medical emergency and urgently needed money to deal with it. My husband emptied everything in his account, but it still wasn't enough. So this friend came to mind, and I called him.
I narrated my problem to him, and he listened attentively. When I was done, he said, “But this is a problem between you and your husband. He married you, so he should be able to help you.”
I told him my husband had done his best and that I needed his help. This was the same man who had always been there for me. He said, “You’re married. Let your husband solve your problems for you.” Then he hung up.
He had the money. If I weren’t married, he would have helped me in the blink of an eye. But once I got married, I could die and he wouldn’t bother because I had a husband. I had to take out a loan to resolve the medical issue.
To this day, whenever I think about it, it hurts me.
So I’m asking the men on this platform: Why don’t you want to help your female friends once they get married? Is there a written law somewhere that says, “Thou shalt withdraw all assistance from a female friend once she gets married?
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